Don't Be A Jerk
A Friendly Note to Christians
Recently I had one of those travel days that challenges your patience. I left my house early, there were multiple delayed flights, I was already tired, only to climax when I arrived at the hotel at almost midnight, the night before I had a full day of preaching.
As I stood in the line, waiting to get access to my room (Yes there was a line at 12am), several people in front of me had been clearly agitated with the staff, for from what I had overheard sounded like valid reasons, however their language was harsh and unnecessary. I stood listening and decided no matter how exhausted I was, no matter what I faced in the next ten minutes, I would lean into kindness and gentleness. Thank God, we have consistent access to these heart postures through Holy Spirit.
Not shockingly this is when I was informed that I “had no reservation.” I gave them my name, my host’s name, the church’s name, anything I could think of without any success. In just one split second I felt the temptation come. The temptation to step out of grace into flesh. I wanted to complain, to express dissatisfaction, and after speaking with my host to get more details, I really wanted to point out the obvious incompetence.
It was a proverbial fork in the road.
I reached out and grabbed the front desk attendant’s hand. I looked her in the eyes. I said, “I’m not mad at you. I’m sorry this has been a difficult night for you. I will be patient until we figure this out. You don’t have to worry.”
The woman burst into tears.
All she managed to say was “You’re the nicest person i’ve ever met, why are you so nice?” To which I probably should have exclaimed, “Jesus,” but instead in the classic way my weird brain works I said, “If I’m the nicest person you’ve ever met, you really need new friends.” She laughed and the interaction led to me being able to minister to her heart.
This conversation has stuck with me for days.
Over the last few years I’ve been increasingly concerned with the lack of the fruit of the Spirit in the life of believers. Social media appears to have emboldened “Christians” to express unkind opinions and accusations to strangers assuming there are no repercussions. We have all watched as leaders have been platformed that run the church like their personal dictatorship where they can boss people around and treat people like pawns in the game to build their own brand.
To be more simple, Christians are acting like jerks unapologetically.
Since when did it become acceptable to claim Christ and act like the devil? Jesus walked in love, mercy, compassion. The fruit of the Spirit is “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness, self-control.” Within His Spirit is the ability to stop being a jerk. Which leads me to believe that if we as the church are unable to practice kindness, patience, self-control, gentleness, and love then we are egregiously spiritually immature.
We need to stop putting a focus on gifting and worldly attributes. Who cares how big your church is, if you’re mean. What benefit is your accurate prophetic word if your assistant cries at night because of how rude you are? To the believer not in career ministry, what type of witness are you having if you berate the waiter at the restaurant for getting your order wrong? Finally, to the internet warrior who thinks it is fine to accuse, belittle, and malign people you don’t know on social media. Do not be fooled, God will not be mocked. You can hide from man behind a computer, but the God you say you serve sees it all.
I recently made a post with five reasons Christians should stop being jerks. I’ll leave those here.
Holy Spirit Isn't A Jerk
When we do not operate in the fruit of the Spirit (Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Gentleness, Faithfulness, Self-Control) this is evidence of spiritual IMMATURITY.
You Have Been Forgiven of Your Sin
He who is forgiven much, loves much. An inability to show grace and mercy is evidence of pride and/or misunderstanding of the Gospel.
Speaking Truth # Being a Jerk
Clear communication and speaking Truth is beautiful and Godly, but once you do it with the attitude of pride, you have stepped out of alignment with the Spirit.
You're Not That Big of a Deal
It doesn't matter your gifting or your title, in the Kingdom we are to "think of others more highly than ourselves" (Phil. 2:3). Jesus Himself was a servant of all and you fall far short of His greatness.
Being a Jerk Has Never Led Anyone Closer to Jesus
If it's God's kindness that leads man toward repentance (Romans 2:4), why do you think your rudeness will build His Kingdom? It might build yours, but it will fall devestatingly short of glorifying Jesus.